Giving of your essence rather than your excess

The Prostitute Archetype

Have you ever compromised your emotional well being to please another person? Do you suppress self-care and self-rest for the happiness of others? How often do you sell out to please others at the expense of yourself? Guess what? We all do it — this is a common human challenge for those of us who are seeking peace.

During times of stress or change, the fear of physical and emotional insecurity can overtake our lives. We sometimes sell out our bodies by working so hard physically, well past our normal comfort level, that we actually hurt ourselves. As a nurse midwife, I often crossed that line and didn’t rest, eat well or drink healthy fluids because I loved working – in other words, I prostituted my well-being by allowing work to consume me. Oh, I was great at telling pregnant mothers what to do, but as for me, my motto was ‘Take my advice, I’m not using it!’ My mind told me, “you don’t have time to rest, you’ve got to write that note, do that laundry, clean your kitchen floor.” Really? Far too often we give of our essence, not of our excess. Why? Because some of us just don’t know how to slow down and take care of ourselves. That’s our prostitute at work.

Essential Oils blends with Neroli, Clary Sage, Geranium and Sandalwood can aid in selfcare and personal nurturing.

Emotionally we prostitute ourselves by saying yes to every commitment under the sun. Why? So that others will be pleased, so others will think we have it all together. We desperately seek the approval of others, and we want a sense of control without the burden of feeling our feelings. But this comes at a huge emotional cost. Our hearts whisper, “please rest and do something for yourself,“ and our heads say, “you don’t have time to read a book, knit a scarf, go to lunch with a friend, or dance to a song on the radio.” Those of us who are caretakers, parents, or have demanding jobs can easily lose touch with inner peace. We can lose our integrity and even faith in ourselves, life, and our prayer life. That’s the negative side of the prostitute archetype.

A healthy way to deal with our prostitute archetype is to use essential oils in times of need. Essential oils can help us balance our mind and heart, so we inhale their essences and connect with our own essence. As a former midwife and now in my aromatherapy practice, clients experiencing menopausal symptoms are seeking ways to slow down and reduce hot flashes, mood swings and other body changes. They use aromatherapy and other methods to slow down, take care of themselves first, and put their prostitute archetype in balance. These wise women have taught me that “no” is a complete sentence – that further explanations are not needed. Their words and actions match on a regular basis. When they do occasionally fall down, essential oils help them get back up, physically ground, and restore a sense of selfcare and nurturing.

Inhaling an essential oil blend can work quickly to calm the mind and heart.

There is great wisdom in seeking professional support as well. The old pattern of selling ourselves out at the expense of our own health takes time to eliminate. Spiritual direction from a qualified person, counselor, or clergy, coupled with aromatherapy can be a door to new faith in your life, a door to finding what is priceless in your life — Peace of mind and heart.


Myss, Caroline, (2003). Sacred Contracts: Awakening Your Divine Potential. Harmony Books; New York.
Choi, SY, Kang,P., Lee HS, & Seol,GH, 2014.
Effects of Inhalation of Essential Oil of Citrus aurantium L. var. amara on Menopausal
Symptoms, Stress, and Estrogen in Postmenopausal Women: A Randomized Controlled Trial. Evidenced Based Complementary Alternative Medicine Journal, 2014;796518.

One thought on “Giving of your essence rather than your excess

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.